Rainy day
Drue gave me the most beautiful card recently and I've been trying to figure out what to do with it. In one sense, I want to frame it but I do like handling it, feeling the note in my hands versus admiring it against a wall.
He summarized everything he likes/loves about me and I love it, needed it and shall treasure it always. Drue is the most expressive of all the men I dated. He doesn't always say the right thing (and I myself, seem pretty adept at sticking my foot in my mouth), but he makes amends and that's what I value most, that he cares what I think and feel.
I think I'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that I can't have all the answers, as much as I pine for them. I don't know what will happen to Drue and me, but I still want to believe in the happily ever after. I don't know that I could ever identify as much with someone as I have with Drue.
I'll always wonder about G. It's interesting to me, to see the way people grow up. One friend of mine reminds me of my mom (a bit). She worries, expresses anxiety and wants everything to be perfect (as do I). She's easily exasperated by her mother who had a hands-off, laid back policy towards her kids. Funnily enough, I imagine that I'd like to be like her mother, letting little G make his own decisions when he has his own kids, versus my butting in. And it makes me wonder how G will turn out, if everything will have to be his way or if he'll be laid back. I'd like to believe he'll be laid back, but it's too hard to say right now. Should be interesting.
It's rainy here and in the 50s. If it was colder, we'd have snow. I wanted to take little G skiing after Christmas, but who knows now. Vegetation experts have noted that we have the same climate as NC now. And they say there's no global warming.
He summarized everything he likes/loves about me and I love it, needed it and shall treasure it always. Drue is the most expressive of all the men I dated. He doesn't always say the right thing (and I myself, seem pretty adept at sticking my foot in my mouth), but he makes amends and that's what I value most, that he cares what I think and feel.
I think I'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that I can't have all the answers, as much as I pine for them. I don't know what will happen to Drue and me, but I still want to believe in the happily ever after. I don't know that I could ever identify as much with someone as I have with Drue.
I'll always wonder about G. It's interesting to me, to see the way people grow up. One friend of mine reminds me of my mom (a bit). She worries, expresses anxiety and wants everything to be perfect (as do I). She's easily exasperated by her mother who had a hands-off, laid back policy towards her kids. Funnily enough, I imagine that I'd like to be like her mother, letting little G make his own decisions when he has his own kids, versus my butting in. And it makes me wonder how G will turn out, if everything will have to be his way or if he'll be laid back. I'd like to believe he'll be laid back, but it's too hard to say right now. Should be interesting.
It's rainy here and in the 50s. If it was colder, we'd have snow. I wanted to take little G skiing after Christmas, but who knows now. Vegetation experts have noted that we have the same climate as NC now. And they say there's no global warming.
posted by Michelle at 7:16 AM
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