what was I thinking?
What was I thinking or what were we thinking? I didn't get into this situation by myself. I'm pregnant again and this wasn't part of the plan. Andreas asked me to get tested again. I took the test twice and called the doc's for a blood test. Apparently, doctors do not run labwork for pregnancy anymore (too expensive). So, ept it is. Due date is September, Andreas' birthday month.
I have no concept re: merging/blending families. G and Andreas have behaved decently towards each other, but I keep waiting for the backlash. And my place is too small. 3 BRs: my room, G's room and the guest room. If Andreas moves in, he'll convert the guest room to his office and we'll all have fun adjusting to my cozy condo. 1800 ft seems big for G and me, tiny for 2 adults and a 5-year old and a baby.
The plan was complete autonomy: my weeks with G, my weeks with Andreas and everyone's happy. Now, a stranger is on the horizon and there will be no breaks from the baby (not right away).
I confess, I was horrified to hear that Andreas believes in 'crying it out.' I always wonder where people hear such things. My parents believed in my crying it out -- hello abandonment issues. I wonder if I could encourage Andreas to read parenting books. I'm no expert, but I know what I've read and it's helped. Dr. Brazelton is my favorite: Touchpoints, the Essential Reference. He too, chides parents that believe their child should cry it out and points out that you only teach the child that he/she shouldn't count on you.
Brazelton also points out that no stepparent should ever expect stepchildren to readily accept them or to be grateful. According to Brazelton, 'the smart stepparent will step back and leave it to the resident parent to decide when and where to act.' So far, Andreas has allowed me to handle G, but I remain concerned that G and Andreas will butt heads since Andreas likes things quiet and G varies.
I liked it better when I could compartmentalize everything. Life's easier that way! But here's to a little variety I guess.
I have no concept re: merging/blending families. G and Andreas have behaved decently towards each other, but I keep waiting for the backlash. And my place is too small. 3 BRs: my room, G's room and the guest room. If Andreas moves in, he'll convert the guest room to his office and we'll all have fun adjusting to my cozy condo. 1800 ft seems big for G and me, tiny for 2 adults and a 5-year old and a baby.
The plan was complete autonomy: my weeks with G, my weeks with Andreas and everyone's happy. Now, a stranger is on the horizon and there will be no breaks from the baby (not right away).
I confess, I was horrified to hear that Andreas believes in 'crying it out.' I always wonder where people hear such things. My parents believed in my crying it out -- hello abandonment issues. I wonder if I could encourage Andreas to read parenting books. I'm no expert, but I know what I've read and it's helped. Dr. Brazelton is my favorite: Touchpoints, the Essential Reference. He too, chides parents that believe their child should cry it out and points out that you only teach the child that he/she shouldn't count on you.
Brazelton also points out that no stepparent should ever expect stepchildren to readily accept them or to be grateful. According to Brazelton, 'the smart stepparent will step back and leave it to the resident parent to decide when and where to act.' So far, Andreas has allowed me to handle G, but I remain concerned that G and Andreas will butt heads since Andreas likes things quiet and G varies.
I liked it better when I could compartmentalize everything. Life's easier that way! But here's to a little variety I guess.
posted by Michelle at 5:54 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home